How Believing You’re “Stronger/Better Than” Others Can Ruin Your Relationships

As humans, we often measure ourselves against others, comparing our strengths and accomplishments to those around us. It’s natural to want to feel strong, successful, and accomplished, but when we start to see ourselves as “better than” others, it can have a negative impact on our relationships. In this article, we will explore the ways in which believing you’re “stronger/better than” others can ruin your relationships and offer strategies for developing more compassionate, empathetic connections.

The Negative Impact of Believing You’re “Stronger/Better Than” Others

When we believe we are “stronger/better than” others, we create a sense of hierarchy that can ultimately lead to division and disconnection. This belief can manifest in various forms, such as constant criticism of others, disregarding their opinions or feelings, and a need to prove our worth and value to others. While these behaviors may stem from a desire to assert our own strengths and accomplishments, they ultimately create a cycle of insecurity and self-doubt that can damage our relationships and prevent personal growth.

Furthermore, this mentality often relies on a flawed understanding of success and achievement. We measure ourselves against arbitrary standards and benchmarks, seeking external validation rather than focusing on our own values, passions, and interests. This can lead to a sense of emptiness and lack of purpose, as we strive to meet societal expectations rather than pursuing our own dreams and goals.

Strategies for Developing More Compassionate, Empathetic Connections

While the “stronger/better than” mentality may seem like a natural and inevitable part of our lives, there are strategies we can use to develop more compassionate, empathetic connections with those around us. These strategies involve cultivating self-awareness, practicing empathy, and embracing vulnerability.

Cultivate Self-Awareness

Cultivating self-awareness involves developing a better understanding of our own values, goals, and passions. By focusing on what matters most to us, we can begin to shift our attention away from external benchmarks and toward our own personal growth and development.

One way to cultivate self-awareness is through journaling, meditation, or other reflective practices. By taking time to reflect on our thoughts and emotions, we can gain a deeper understanding of ourselves and begin to identify patterns of comparison and insecurity.

Practice Empathy

Practicing empathy involves putting ourselves in the shoes of others and truly understanding their perspectives and experiences. It means listening deeply, without judgment or criticism, and seeking to understand rather than assert our own opinions or beliefs.

One way to practice empathy is by actively listening to others, asking open-ended questions, and reflecting back their thoughts and feelings. By valuing and acknowledging the perspectives of others, we can build deeper connections that are based on empathy and understanding, rather than hierarchy and competition.

Embrace Vulnerability

Embracing vulnerability involves accepting ourselves for who we are, flaws and all, and being willing to share our authentic selves with others. It means showing up fully and authentically, even when we feel uncertain or afraid.

One way to embrace vulnerability is by sharing our own struggles and challenges with others, rather than projecting an image of strength or perfection. By being vulnerable, we can build deeper connections and create a safe space for others to do the same.


Believing we are “stronger/better than” others can be a source of insecurity, disconnection, and even ruin our relationships. By cultivating self-awareness, practicing empathy, and embracing vulnerability, we can develop more compassionate, empathetic connections that are based on mutual understanding and respect. These strategies require a willingness to let go of societal expectations and pursue our own values and passions, but the rewards – greater compassion, deeper connections, and personal growth – are well worth the effort.


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